Being in love is a beautiful thing. Romance is in the air. The birds are chirping, the sun is shining and all is right with the world. Then reality sets in. This is not what you signed up for. What began as a wonderful love story is slowly turning into a walk in the twilight zone. When did things change? How did you not notice?
Often when we think we're in love, we're really in the land of delusion. I know it's hard to admit, but it's where most of us live in the beginning stages of any romance. We're so enchanted with love stories and romanticized fairytales, that we forget to keep our feet firmly planted in reality. The truth is that your wonderful love interest does have flaws.
No matter how great he or she is, they are not perfect. No one is nor should we expect them to be. Though they are not perfect, they could have the wonderful combination of imperfections that suits us wonderfully.
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1. There is no defined commitment - I know you're saying, duh??? But I'm always surprised when I talk to some heartbroken person who finds out their "one-and-only" has another love interest. Really? If he or she hasn't defined the relationship, you're not in one. Know this and never give your heart to someone who hans't even taken the time to commit to you exclusively.
2. You can't be yourself - When you find yourself always trying to "become" what you think your mate desires, you're headed for trouble. You will never be happy living out a role you're playing to please someone else. You are wonderful and the BEST you on the earth. Flaunt it! If someone can't love the real you, they don't deserve you.
3. You can't voice your opinion - You are not a robot. You do have a brain, so use it! No one has to follow your advice, but if he or she doesn't at least acknowledge it, move on.
4. You can't have a life outside of your mate - No one wants to be smothered. While you may enjoy your mate's company, having friendships and camaraderie with others is healthy. If your mate denies you that privilege, they are telling you they don't trust you. The person you are connecting with should trust your judgement in people. Afterall, if you had enough sense to select them, perhaps you do know how to select good friends.
5. You have to compete for your date's attention - While you don't want to monopolize all of your date's time, you do want to be seen as a priority in his or her life. If you are always begging them to spend time with you, they are silently telling you what is really important to them. Always believe what a person does.
While these few signs may not necessarily mean there is no hope for the survival of the relationship, they are things that should give you pause. The decisions you make now will affect your future. Proceed with caution.
Often when we think we're in love, we're really in the land of delusion. I know it's hard to admit, but it's where most of us live in the beginning stages of any romance. We're so enchanted with love stories and romanticized fairytales, that we forget to keep our feet firmly planted in reality. The truth is that your wonderful love interest does have flaws.
No matter how great he or she is, they are not perfect. No one is nor should we expect them to be. Though they are not perfect, they could have the wonderful combination of imperfections that suits us wonderfully.
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But how do you know if those imperfections are flaws you can live with or simply the warning signals of danger ahead. Should you stay and accept those imperfections as a part of life or should you pack your bags and decide to move on. While everyone has their own litmus test, I'd like to offer five sure signs that let you know your relationship may not survive.
1. There is no defined commitment - I know you're saying, duh??? But I'm always surprised when I talk to some heartbroken person who finds out their "one-and-only" has another love interest. Really? If he or she hasn't defined the relationship, you're not in one. Know this and never give your heart to someone who hans't even taken the time to commit to you exclusively.
2. You can't be yourself - When you find yourself always trying to "become" what you think your mate desires, you're headed for trouble. You will never be happy living out a role you're playing to please someone else. You are wonderful and the BEST you on the earth. Flaunt it! If someone can't love the real you, they don't deserve you.
3. You can't voice your opinion - You are not a robot. You do have a brain, so use it! No one has to follow your advice, but if he or she doesn't at least acknowledge it, move on.
4. You can't have a life outside of your mate - No one wants to be smothered. While you may enjoy your mate's company, having friendships and camaraderie with others is healthy. If your mate denies you that privilege, they are telling you they don't trust you. The person you are connecting with should trust your judgement in people. Afterall, if you had enough sense to select them, perhaps you do know how to select good friends.
5. You have to compete for your date's attention - While you don't want to monopolize all of your date's time, you do want to be seen as a priority in his or her life. If you are always begging them to spend time with you, they are silently telling you what is really important to them. Always believe what a person does.
While these few signs may not necessarily mean there is no hope for the survival of the relationship, they are things that should give you pause. The decisions you make now will affect your future. Proceed with caution.
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